Growing up as a Christin college kid, eventually you’re gonna be asked to “share your testimony” and when that moment comes, you better hope you have something dramatic to report!

Like how you had an addiction or negligent parents or were suicidally depressed and God came along and radically saved you…

I don’t know call it our fixation with the Hollywood story “arc” (good guy>bad guy>conflict>resolution), but for some reason when its your turn to share and you pipe up saying how you were, ‘raised in a secure and loving home filled with Jesus and the hope of glory,’ it feels like it doesn’t have the same affect…

But shouldn’t we celebrate this story with equal or greater fervor?!

In fact, doesn’t it’s rare nature indicate to us the corresponding level of celebration and praise required?

Apparently, the successful baton pass of faith has never been regarded with that much esteem. Perhaps part of the answer to that question lies within our Jewish ancestors. There are two ways to make certain the baton of faith is not passed down in your family legacy and those are: 1, failure to remember and; 2, the influence of the surrounding culture…

A verse that has been foundational for us is found in Judges chapter two:

In the first part, you can see the dropping of the baton… they neither knew God nor saw all that he had done. Did they not see it first person or did they simply forget the oral tradition? Did they fail to repeat it in the in the house, on the road, in the morning and at night (Deut 6)?

The second part is also infinitely clear: they traded the truth of God for a lie… the lie of the surrounding culture. Now we need not give “the world” (the Bible talks of 3 main threats to our formation to Jesus: the world, the flesh, the devil) too much credit or authority, but it remains the #1 threat to our radical counterculture movement.

Just as important aside though, which answers the question: what will it feel like practically to face “the world” head on??
Something like this…

When you decide to discipline your toddlers instead of letting them “lead the way,” you will face the headwinds of culture…
When you decide to op for a basic phone instead of a smart phone for your 12-year old you will face the headwinds of culture…
When you decide to op for a courtship during the teen/young adult years instead of private dating, (because we just implicitly trust teenage boys and girls to be off by themselves without consequence?!), you will… you can fill in the blank.

But living into the culture’s vision for our generational legacies is not the expectation God holds for us.

This 3-part series will unpack the following fundamental elements of Christian parenting:
1, discipleship in the home;
2, the relationship between the church and the family and;
3, how to impart a biblical worldview to the next generation.

But before we go there, a quick word on definitions… As a father (and pastor) of 11 kids, the question of forming your children around the ways and words of Jesus (“discipleship”) is our central preoccupation.

If discipleship is too much of a “buzzword” for you, consider this definition of formation from Dallas Willard:

He goes on to say that from the terrorist to the grocery store clerk, everyone has been deeply formed by some set of culture, values and norms. The question once again is: which one will your kids get?

Discipleship in the home

Formation in the home looks like this: doing forgiveness and reconciliation (sometimes a dozen times a day); asking questions (and searching for answers together) and discipline, discipline, discipline.

These are just 3 categories-granted pretty broad categories-that we find prevailing in our home every single day.
And you can find a gospel center for each one of these categories.

Take the first one, for example, forgiveness and reconciliation. These are a constant when you have kids of all ages frequently crossing one another’s “boundaries,” offending, sometimes cursing, kicking screaming at one another. What could be more central to the Gospel than the idea of forgiveness?

So ask: how do we slow down long enough so we can break these moments down when they happen?
What is the model for rupture and repair in our home?
How are we modeling this as the central leadership figures in the home (i.e. mom & dad)?

We could go on and on about models but for now try this…​

Break down the conflict by using “when you did x, it made me feel y,” one party says, “I’m sorry;” the other “I forgive you.”
Think about question and answer time in the home-again perhaps dozens and dozens of time per day (e.g. why? Why? WHY?), but what an opportunity for framing values and Biblical worldview!

Finally, reconsider your thoughts and habits around discipline-yes for the umpteenth time…

The author of Hebrews says,

Now trust us when we say, few things are more fatiguing and just patently hard than the seemingly endless leaning in, “taking pains” when kids are out of line, but when you keep the truth of this verse in your foresight, it really helps!

Think about how many areas of formation are related to discipline: boundaries; limits; law; grace; self-control; consequence; morality (right from wrong)… AND if you extended discipline to include household chores then you would have a whole 2nd tier of formation benefits!

I’m sorry to end this way, but the culture is so very pervise right now in this moment. We watch videos and reels every day it seems-railing against making kids doing chores, railing against kids being disciplined, railing against making kids share even!

That last one really makes us scratch our heads… but here’s the thing guys: the videos sound really insidiously good and convincing, like as if they have discovered some new science or technology in child-rearing.

But let me tell you, it’s true what the wisest man on earth, King Solomon, once said:

There’s nothing new under the sun!
Trust the ancient words and ways of Jesus and your home will always be filled with faith!

-Ben & Rylee

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